Fixing and Finding Our Way
by kaitlinmgoodman
Summary: Spin off of Lizzys.Feelz "Broken and Mended Hearts" Rosemary and Lee have experiences and stories to tell, and I've taken that task. Will they be able to get through this together or will they call it quits? CREDS Lizzys.Feelz for the title and dialogue to come! All of the ideas in this story are original by my own thoughts on the show.
1. Prologue

**PROLOGUE**

 **BEFORE READING, I HIGHLY RECOMMEND READING** **"BROKEN AND MENDED HEARTS"** **BECAUSE THIS IS A SPIN OFF AND WILL SHARE SOME OF THE DIALOGUE.**

 _Why am I so lightheaded?_ I thought to myself. Maybe I didn't eat enough and I'm just hungry. After all, this has happened before.

 _Why was it so hot?_ I went upstairs to pin my hair to calm myself. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror...I was so pale but my body was screaming at me to sit down and get a cold rag to cool off.

Nevermind, I made my way to the staircase- and then it hit me- a sharp, stabbing pain in my pelvis and all of a sudden the stairs seemed to be getting closer and closer.

 **About an hour and a half had gone by**

Lee walks in the door and immediately senses that something is wrong. The pot is smoking from water that was boiling and the meat was the the verge of starting a grease fire. As he starts to run towards the stove, his eye is caught by a figure on the island between the steps of the stairs.

He looked in disbelief as he saw this all too familiar face, his beloved Rosemary, white as a ghost and covered in blood. _Oh my God!_ Lee thought to himself. "Rosie, honey, wake up!" Now shaking her shoulders trying to wake her… but she's unresponsive. He runs next door to get Jack.

 **A strong knock echoes throughout the Thornton home.**

Elizabeth comes to the door with Abby on her hip. "Lee what's the matter?" she can tell something is wrong.

He was on the verge of crying and all he could say was "It's Rosemary."

Elizabeth runs to the kitchen and gets Jack and he and Lee take off out the door.

Jack runs to the infirmary to inform Carson of what's happened and Faith is right behind them.

Lee wraps Rosie in his arms and heads to the infirmary. As Jack opens the door, Carson approaches, "What happened, Lee?"

"I'm not sure, Carson, all I know is that I found her unresponsive on the stairs, and look," Lee said pointing out her once-grey skirt that is bright red from blood.

"Okay," said Carson, "Lee, I'm sorry but I need everyone out."

Lee upsettingly and unwillingly obliges. He and Jack meet Elizabeth at Abigail's.

 **Meanwhile in the infirmary**

"Okay, so the bleeding must be abdominal," says Carson, as he applies firm pressure to her lower abdomen which causes a faint and barely audible moan from Rosemary. "I can feel some swelling so we need to get in there NOW. Please sterilized the tools for me while I get suited and wash my hands." Carson said while locking the door. He makes the first incision and immediately he and Faith share a glance. "This is far worse than I thought" he said.


	2. Chapter 1

"Is that what I think it is?" asked Faith.

"Yes, it is an ectopic pregnancy and she is bleeding profusely," said Carson, "and if we don't get this under control, we will lose her."

 _Where am I?_

The last thing I remember is the excruciating pain right before I went to finish dinner, but now I just feel calm.

A tiny toddler-like figure approached me. "Mama!" the little girl exclaimed.

 _She must be confused.._ Turning around to see her mother behind me, but there was no one there. "Honey, I don't see your mother, but I can help you look for her. What does she look like?"

"You're my mommy," she said, "You didn't know it, but I was growing in your tummy but not in the right place. I promise it didn't hurt me mommy, and you'll see me again but not for a long time. You have to go take care of daddy. He's really worried about you. I will always be with you and daddy. Don't ever forget that! Jesus is going to take care of me and will be watching over you and protecting you!"

I looked at her in disbelief but I trusted everything she said. Afterall, she did have Lee's black hair and my ocean-blue eyes. As she giggled and ran towards a figure I couldn't quite make out, everything seemed to fade away and a wave of peace came over me. I could now tell that I was back in my body and definitely had my feelings back as pain seared through me like I had been branded with a cattle iron . I heard a deep, familiar voice.

"Rosie, sweetheart, can you hear me?" Lee's tone was worried but steady, nonetheless. "Can you open your eyes for me, _Squidget_?" He chuckled lightly. He knew he could always get a rise out of me but he sighed when I didn't respond.

No matter how hard I tried, my body just wouldn't cooperate. I felt so weak. I finally used all the strength I had and spoke just above a whisper.."Leland Coulter, I thought we agreed to just being sweethearts." I was finally able to open my eyes and saw the silent sobs and tears streaming down my beautiful husband's face. He gave me a tight embrace and a soft kiss on my forehead.

"I'll give you two some privacy," Carson spoke up, and made his way to the door and Faith followed.

I told Lee what happened in my experience while I was unconscious and he sat there in shock as I told him in vivid detail everything I saw and our little girl. He told me that, in fact, what I knew true even to the description that we had a daughter. Carson confirmed, I had only been far enough along in my first trimester, about twelve weeks and she was starting to really grow which is what caused the strain on my body. All I could do was cry. The both of us just sat there holding each other, sobbing for our precious baby girl.

"We need to give her a name," Lee pulled away from me, staring into my eyes. "What about Evelyn?" he said. "It was my great grandmother's name."

"Oh Lee, it's lovely!" I exclaimed. "Hmmm Evelyn...Evelyn, oh! How about Evelyn Elizabeth?"

"I think it is just perfect," Lee said "Elizabeth is so important to us and it would mean so much to her. It's settled then, Evelyn Elizabeth Coulter."


	3. Chapter 2

*About a month had gone by. Dottie was out if town, seeing her son, Bradley, off to war. Clara had a breakfast date with Jesse at Abigail's, so Rosemary is looking after the dress shop.*

 _Has it already been a month?_ I was oblivious to the fact that Elizabeth had walked in a few minutes ago. I could still see Evelyn's face in my mind, clear as day. _What if I lost my only chance to be a mother?_ _I'll never get to hear the sweet beckoning of a child calling to me._ My heart felt as though it had been ripped out of my chest. Everyone keeps asking what happened to me and if I'm okay.. I just can't bring myself to answer truthfully to either question so Lee and I just saw I had a serious case of influenza.

Elizabeth clears her throat. "Um, Rosemary?" she said in a worried tone.

"Oh, Elizabeth, I'm sorry, what can I help you with today?" I said trying to keep my tone as nonchalant as possible.

"Actually, I came to check on you," Elizabeth continued, "you haven't really seemed to be yourself lately."

"Well you know i had the flu," I said defensively.

"Are you sure it was the flu?" Elizabeth asked. Acting as if she already knew what happened.

"Elizabeth Thornton, what are you getting at?" I insisted.

"Rosemary, I just want you to know that I'm here for you if you ever need to talk." She said in a soft, mother-like tone.

"Thank you." I said. As a tear caught in my eye, I turned away from Elizabeth to not show her how i really felt. She reached out and touched my hand.

"Rosemary," she said, giving me that worried face she had made so many times, mostly for Jack. "I didn't mean to upset you by saying anything earlier but I saw Lee that day, carrying you, and I saw you were covered in blood," she continued, "and you've been isolating yourself from everyone and everything and that is just not like you."

I turned back toward her to see a tear forming in her eye. I made my way to the door and changed the " **OPEN** " sign to " **CLOSED**." We made our way to the back and sat down at the drawing table. "Oh Elizabeth," was all I could bring myself to say as my body was racked with sobs. I felt Elizabeth's arms wrap around me and hold me in a tight embrace. After a few moments I pulled away and looked at her. _Here it goes…_ "I lost the baby," I cried.

Elizabeth, now looking stunned, said "Oh Rosemary, I'm so sorry."

"The worst part was I didn't even know," I continued, "How could I be so heartbroken over losing something… someone, I didn't even know I had?"

"I can't imagine how you must be feeling. You have been talking about having children for quite some time now."

"I feel like such a disappointment," I said, stammering over my thoughts.

"What do you mean?" Elizabeth asked.

"Lee really wanted this, maybe even more than me. Afterall, we did talk about children before we were married. I feel terrible because I only just started to want this too." I said.

"We can't control how or why things happen to us, Rosemary." Elizabeth started. "God has a plan for us, and to grow from the hard times we go through. We have to each other to lean on and to give each other hope. I mean, why else would I name my daughter after you, Rosemary?" she said taking my hands. "You are so important to the people of Hope Valley. You brighten our days even when they feel like the darkest, and I never thought that the day I met you that you would be so important to me and my family. You are so loved by everyone, especially Abby Rose."


	4. Chapter 3

"Well, I do have something to tell you Elizabeth…" I said.

"What is it?" Elizabeth asked, sounding concerned.

"I know it sounds crazy but when I was in the infirmary, unconscious, I died…" I hesitated….

"You… what?" Elizabeth said shocked, sounding like she didn't quite know what to say.

"Well, I went to this place..it..it was strange." I stumbled over my words.

"Was it all white? And nothing around?" Elizabeth asked.

"Yes...How did you.."

"Remember when I wouldn't wake up, just after I had Abby? I went to a place just like that." she said, and I felt less mad.

"Oh my. Well all I remember before I went to the white place is trying to go down my stairs and then I was hit with this horrible pain. When I got there, there was a little girl calling out to her mother but I was the only one there…" I told her.

"She was talking to you?"

I nodded "She was. She explained to me in every detail what happened to me and that she wasn't growing in the right place so God needed her to help look after Lee and I from heaven."

Elizabeth put her hand over her heart, "Oh, Rosemary, that was your little girl."

"She was beautiful, Elizabeth," I sighed, "She looked just like Lee in every way, but she had my eyes," I could feel the lump forming in my throat, "When Lee confirmed what I already knew when I came to, we decided that she should have a name even if God had other plans to take her from us."

Elizabeth smiled, "That's beautiful, what did you decide on for a name?"

I took a deep breath, "Her name is Evelyn..Evelyn **Elizabeth** Coulter."

Her eye widened, "You gave her the name Elizabeth? … After me?"

I nodded and took her hand, "Yes. You have been so kind to me and after all we have been through, you are like a sister to me and you will always be family." I smiled, "Lee and I adore you and had Evie been able to stay with us, you and Jack would be her godparents. I wouldn't trust anyone else to take care of my children." I said reassuringly.

"You are some of the most important family I have, Rosemary. You and Lee. That means so much to me. It's truly an honor." there was a tear forming in her eye as she spoke. Just then I heard the lock on the door click and Jack walked in with Abby. I realized that as constable, Jack had a key to every business to be able to unlock the doors in any situation. This one being seeing his wife and her best friend locked in the dress shop, he was obviously worried judging by the look on his face.

"There you are," Jack said, relieved, "Rosemary," he nodded. Turning back to Elizabeth he said,"Sweetheart, Mrs. Macafee is sick and can't watch the baby for the day."

"Oh dear, I hope she's alright," Elizabeth said worriedly.

Jack continued, "She said it's just a cold, but she doesn't want to give anything to Abby."

Elizabeth sighed, "I'm grateful for that. But who'll watch her? I have school and you have your rounds. I could stay home and ask Florence to teach today, I wasn't planning on too much for the day anyhow?"

"Nonsense, I'll watch her," I said.

"But you're here." Elizabeth sounded uncertain.

I reassured her,"Clara will be back soon and she's watched the store alone before. Please, Elizabeth, let me." I was practically begging to get out of there. Plus Abby made me feel closer to my Evie.

Jack still voiced some concern,"We don't want to cause you any trouble."

"I promise she will be fine. We won't have much business with Dottie out of town." Hopefully I sounded more reassuring. _What I wouldn't give to have another child_..I wanted to just cuddle up with Abby all day and play with her. Boy did I have plans for us!

Elizabeth finally agreed, "If you're sure. If she's any trouble at all, please come and get me."

Excitedly I exclaimed," Oh Elizabeth, we will be just fine!" Practically snatching Abby from Jack, I continued, "Okay you two, I do believe you have work to attend to! Abby, we are going to have lots of fun, aren't we?" I cooed.

Abby giggled and clapped her hands at me. _Gosh she was so perfect. I couldn't wait to have my own._

"Say bye, bye to Mommy and Daddy!" I cooed.

"Bye, bye!" Abby giggled as she waved with both hands.

Elizabeth stood there shocked, "Oh, geez, okay. Goodbye, my love." She kissed Abby's forehead "Mama will see you later."

Jack talking in his baby voice said "Be good for your Aunt Rosemary." They both walk out the door arm in arm.

Me, continuing my baby talk, turning to Abby, "Hi beautiful! Can you say Aunt Rosie?"

Abby grinned a huge three tooth smile, "Wooosieeeeeeeee!" she said, giggling and pointing to me.

"Are you gonna help your favorite Auntie at work until Clara gets back?"

 _My heart burned as I heard Abby say my name. I enjoyed being able to spend time with her and could feel myself coming to accept the reality of dear Evie_.

As I turned my attention back to Abby, I noticed she had grabbed some of my scrap fabrics and was playing with them. I couldn't help but notice how the lavender color complimented her hair and then there was this other one… this light blue, almost powder blue, and it made her beautiful greyish-blue eyes come to life even more. "Abby, would you like Auntie Rosie to make you a new bow? We will use the colors you have in your hand," I cooed.

Abby, still fascinated by the colors, giggled as she waved around the fabrics. "Booooowwwww!" she said with much excitement.

I laughed. "I'll take that as a yes, then." I picked her up and brought her over to the sewing machine. Dottie was finally able to get one so it would be easier to transfer our designs.

I sat Abby on my lap then guided our hands in the loops of the bow. I held her left hand over the loop as I guided our right hands to sew them together and the bow came into form. We finished and moved on to the other side, and the bow was done in no time. "Look, Abby, we did it!" I said enthusiastically. "You were the best helper Auntie Rosie has ever had!"

"Yay, Auntie Wooosiee!" She giggled and clapped her hands. She reached up for me to pick her back up.

I scooped her up and put the bow in her hair. _Gosh, she looked so beautiful._ All of her features were dramatically enhanced with this one little bow. " Abby, my darling, you look beautiful." I said as I hugged her.

"Dank ooo," she looked up at me with those beautiful eyes and put her little hands on my cheeks and said "I wooove ooo Wooossieeee."

 _Oh my word. This child was exactly what I needed today._ My heart swelled with joy as i was overcome by peace and love in this very moment, everything seemed to be perfect. "I love you too, darling." At about that time, Clara came back in from her breakfast with Jesse. "Good morning, Clara! How was breakfast?"

"It was wonderful. You would think I would be used to it by now, but I'm still in such awe at how wonderful Abigail is at cooking!" She exclaimed." Hello little one!" she said to Abby.

Abby giggled and waved.

"Where's Elizabeth?" Clara asked.

"She's at the school. got sick and she was going to take off school but I offered to watch her… I hope you don't mind. I knew that with Dottie out of town we wouldn't have many orders. Do you think you could manage if I take her home?"

"Of course!" Clara reassured me. "You go take care of her and have fun! Oohhhh, what a lovely bow!"

"We just made it," I said. "Abby helped, didn't you?"

"Uhhh-huuhhhh!" she smiled.

" Thank you so much, Clara," _I really couldn't thank her enough for this._

"Rosemary, you are more than welcome. You need this day to yourself. I can tell something has been on your mind lately."

"Thank you, again, Clara," I said walking out the door with Abby on my hip.

We walked Abigail's to see her and she was...preoccupied. As when we walked in they practically sprang apart.

"Oh, I'm sorry," I said turning away and making sure Abby faced away too, "I'll come back later,"

"No Rosemary, it's alright," She straightened out the skirts of her dress and tucked stray hair behind her ear, "What can I do for you?"

"I uhh," I couldn't seem to form the words.

"I'll go," Henry went over and pecked Abigail on the cheek, "I'll see you later," he said. "Goodbye, Rosemary. Goodbye Miss Abby," He shook the baby's hand and she giggled while watching him leave.

I turned to Abigail, wide eyed, "Do you realize it's almost the middle of the day?" making her look down, "You need to tell me every detail." Just this short time with Abby, I already felt a little more like myself.

"Rosemary, how can I help you today?" Abigail said.

 _She's lucky I've got a busy mind right now!_ "I was thinking about taking Lee some roast for lunch at work today. Abby misses her Uncle Lee!"

"Alright," Abigail said, "Did you want to give him any dessert?"

"Oatmeal raisin cookies and a slice of apple pie, please!" I told her.

"Um, isn't Lee allergic to those cookies?"

"Well, he called me 'Squidget'..." I said defensively.

"SO YOU WANT TO KILL HIM?" She asked, baffled.

"No, it's a joke! The pie is his real dessert." I reassured her. Taking the basket from her hands as she held it out, giving me a stern look of disapproval of my joke. I smiled, "Thank you."

As I made my way to the mill, Abby's face lit up because she recognized where we were going and started clapping her hands and chanting "Unkie Wee! Unkie Wee!"

I opened the door and he and Hickam acted as if they had been caught doing something they shouldn't be…talking in hushed tones.

Hickam cleared his throat "Good afternoon, ."

"Hello Hickam!" I greeted. "Lee what are you up to?"

"Oh nothing, Darling, I just an order for some lumber and Hickam was helping with the numbers." He replied sheepishly.

 _Something's up and I'm going to find out what it is._ "Oh Lee," I said giving a look that even Hickam interpreted as it was his time to leave. As Hickam left, I turned to Lee."What was that about?" I questioned.

"Sweetheart, don't worry about it, I promise everything is fine." He said holding up his hands.

"Only because I have my mind preoccupied, I will let this slide," I teased.

"Hello there, Miss Abby Rose!" Lee cooed.

"Unkie Weeeeeee!" She said and she practically leapt out of my arms and straight to his.

"I missed you so much," he said in his baby voice."Thank you for bringing me lunch. Darling," he said turning to me. "Say, when was the last time Jack and Elizabeth were alone? Like…..alone alone?"

"I'm not sure I understand what you're getting at, Lee…" I paused. _Ohhhh…..alooone…_ "I'm not sure." I said

"Why don't you see if we could keep Abby overnight tonight and let them reconnect. Also, I have seen how much she changes your whole mood and I think it would do us both some good to spend time with her."

"I think that's a wonderful idea! I'll run it by Elizabeth this afternoon when she comes to pick Abby up."


	5. Message To Readers

Hello all! I'm so sorry I haven't updated in a while. I am posting my new chapter tonight and I wanted to tell you all that it will be unusually long because I wanted to catch up to the "Broken and Mended Hearts" timeline. I hope that you will understand that I will not be posting long chapters all the time. With that being said, I look forward to seeing your reviews! Thank you so much for your support.

*** If you haven't already followed my fan account on instagram, please do! memphisheartie21


	6. Chapter 4

As I started home to lay Abby down for a nap, she squealed when she saw the field of flowers across from our house "Auntie Wosiee," she point, "fowerssss!" she was squirming to get down.

"Okay dear, we will play for a minute," I said… _I don't think I will ever be able to say no to her. It's just something about her..._ She was crawling and giggling, waving around a buttercup. I laughed.

I was crouching down not too far from her when she tried to stand up, a little unsteady at first but she was able to take a couple of steps towards me and held the buttercup out "Auntie Wosie, It for youuuuu!" She exclaimed before losing her balance and landing in my lap. I scooped her up "Thank you darling, it is almost as beautiful as you." I said as I kissed her cheek, causing her to giggle and hug my neck.

As I walked up the steps I looked around me and noticed the beauty that I was surrounded by; the tall grass swaying in the breeze, the flowers dancing, and the birds swirling around one another. I sighed with content and walked through my door.

I sat Abby on the couch, "Okay baby girl, it's time for you to take a nap." I cooed. Her eyes fluttered as she drifted into slumber. I put pillows all around her so she couldn't roll off and started straightening up the house before Elizabeth arrived and put on some tea.

It had been about an hour and Abby was stirring around so I picked her up, changed her diaper and set her down on the floor. I went and grabbed some of the toys I had picked up for her at the mercantile. I guess I went a little overboard, because I noticed out of all of the toys we had she was just focused on one in particular… A small wooden horse.

She would make the cutest sounds pretending to be the horse running through the meadows. She handed me another one of them and we pretended to chase each other around and around, giggling and babbling to one another. In that moment I forgot all of my sorrows and was at peace with my life. I may not have been able to see or hold my daughter but God gave me sweet Abby as a reminder that life is precious and to remind me that I am ready to be a mother and I am not alone.

Forgetting that I was in deep thoughts, I almost jumped out of my skin when I heard a knock at the door. _It must be Elizabeth.._

I scooped Abby up and she was babbling and I was encouraging her and said "Oh, really?" I made my way to the door with her on my hip, "Hello, Elizabeth!"

"Hi!" she laughed.

"Mama!" Abby reached for her and I handed her over.

"Hello, baby girl!" she took her and kissed her cheek, "Were you behaved for Auntie Rosie today?"

"She was an absolute angel, Elizabeth, so much in fact that I have felt better today than I have the past month!" My eyes lit up.

She smiled, "I'm so glad!"

I opened the door more and stepped aside, "Come on in, Elizabeth, would you like some tea?" I asked.

"I'd love some, thank you." she smiled and walked in past me. There were toys strewn about the room, "Well, you two seemed to have an entertaining day,"

I closed the door and walked up next to her, looking at the living room, "We sure have," I sighed "I just wish we could have had more time." I looked down at the floor somewhat upset.

"There's tomorrow at her party,"she said, "And the day after, and after that." she laughed, "We live right next door."

I looked at her, _today has been my best day that I've had in a long time.. Tell her that_ , "Well, with Jack just recently regaining his memory, I was wondering if you'd like some alone time and I would really enjoy Miss Abby's company tonight," I cooed the last part.

I could tell she was taken aback by my request, "I… well… We haven't had any alone time, no, but we've been spending time as a family, the three of us… but it has been a long time…" I could see her pondering the thought.

"Oh, please, please Elizabeth," I begged.

"I don't want to impose, Rosemary. To leave Abby as your responsibility just so Jack and I can be alone?"

"Lee and I already discussed keeping her tonight when Abby and I brought him his lunch this afternoon. We would love nothing more than to spend more time with our precious niece."

I really wanted this, and I really needed this.

"If you're sure about it." she took a breath, "I trust you and Lee. If at any point she gets to be too much, please come and get us."

I smiled from ear to ear, "Thank you so much!" I jumped up and down, and practically knocking her over with a hug. "I'm sure she will be perfect," I reassured.

"She likes for you to think that," she said as Abby grabbed for her earring, "Exhibit A. Honey, no. Don't touch, mommy wants to keep her ears intact, please." she moved her hand away but Abby just grabbed for her hair instead. She heaved a sigh and untangled her daughter's fingers from her hair. "You said something about tea before?" she asked.

I nodded, "Right. Sit." I replied, walking to retrieve the kettle, and she obeyed, " So what are you going to do tonight since you will be baby-free?" I smirked.

She ignored my smirk though, "Probably sleep. Go to bed early." she shrugged, Abby still attempting to grab her hair so she twisted it up into a quick bun.

I turned to her, a hand on my hip and gave her a look, "Elizabeth. Really," I glared. " Tell the truth." Now looking at her with both hands on my hips.

She rolled her eyes, "I can't confirm, nor deny anything Rosemary," I still stared daggers into her, "But as you've always said, these walls are paper thin, so you'll be the first to know, won't you?"

With that being said, I didn't let her stay a minute later and rushed her out the door so I could plan my night with Abby. I started cooking dinner, battering up the steak. It's been a long time since I've made it. Lee will be very happy. Once I got the steak in the pan I started cutting up my potatoes and putting seasonings here and there. I looked at Abby playing with her horse and said "Abby, dear, do you like mashed potatoes?"

"Taaaytoessss!" she squealed.

"I'll take that as a yes!" I giggled.

Lee walked through the door, "Why hello beautiful!" he exclaimed.

"Hi Sweetheart," I said.

"I was talking to Abby, Sweetheart."

I turned around after putting the steaks in a plate, the hot pan still in my hand "Leland Coulter!" He was almost right behind me holding Abby, looking at me with his eyes about as big as the wheels of stagecoach. I laughed and wiped the pan out and put it back on the stove. "Honey, what's wrong?" I said.

He shook the shocked look off of his face. "Sorry Sweetheart," he gave me a soft kiss on the lips. "I see Elizabeth took you up on our offer." he said with excitement in his voice.

I don't know who was happier about Abby staying, Lee or myself. "You're just in time for dinner, I made chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes, and green beans."

"It all looks delicious, Thank you," he smiled at me and gave me that look, the one I fell in love with the day I met him.

I was feeding Abby at first and then Lee chimed in, "Sweetheart, I'll feed Abby, you need to eat too."

"Are you sure you're up for that challenge?" I laughed.

"Of course!" He said.

"Okay," I gave him her plate. "Abby eat good for Uncle Lee, please."

She clapped and giggled.

"Okay Miss Abby," he said "here's a bite" he cooed.

 _How could this man be even more beautiful now than I already thought he was. He's going to be such a great father. I can not wait to have_ _ **his**_ _children. We are definitely going to talk after Abby goes to bed._

"That was such a good bite, Honey!" he praised. "Would you like to try and hold the spoon?"

"Mhmmm!" she clapped and held her hands out.

"Okay, here you go," he was placing the spoon in her hand with the potatoes on it, "this is how you hold it. He had his hands over hers and moving her fingers just right so it would be steady. "Another bite, ready? I'll help you with this one." she brought the spoon to her mouth and cheerfully ate the potatoes. "Wonderful!" he said, clapping his hands, "YAY ABBY!"

I clapped my hands in agreement "Good job babygirl!"

"M..mmoreee peeeeaseeee," she babbled.

"Okay, here you go," Lee handed her another spoonful to eat on her own.

She looked at me and giggled.

Lee caught my eye again with a look that stared into my soul and made me feel at peace and my heart was so overwhelmed at the thought of having our own little family. He smiled and about that time I heard a splat and Abby's potatoes were all over his face and shirt. I couldn't help but laugh uncontrollably. He flinched back and started laughing, "Okay Miss Abby I think it's time Auntie Rosie gave you a bath and get ready for bed, what do you say?"

"Oootayyy!" she giggled as I picked her up to take her upstairs.

I had just put Abby to bed and walked downstairs to find Lee finishing up the dishes and had already cleaned up the kitchen. I didn't let him know I was downstairs, but made my way to the living room to pick up Abby's toys. Just as I finished, I stood up and felt his arms wrap around my waist and pull me to him.

"You're amazing, you know." He kissed my neck and sent chills down my body.

"Lee," I hesitated and faced towards him, "I…"

He looked at me and caressed my cheek. "I know." He kissed my forehead.

I took a deep breath, "Today made me realize a dream I never really wanted until I met you. Spending the day taking care of Abby has helped me so much more than I could have imagined. Lee, I would really love to try for another child."

"R..Really?' he stammered. "Are you sure you're going to be okay with this?"

"Yes, Dear, I am absolutely sure. God will be in control and no matter what happens I trust that He will take care of us."

"As do I," he said.

This was surprising coming from him due to him not really having much religious background. I felt tears forming in my eyes and looked up at his beautiful eyes, "You have no idea how much that means to me," I said shakily.

"I do, Honey, that is why I have been praying since before the day we got married, because I knew it was important to you. He who puts God first will always feel at peace. I would like for us to pray."

"O..Okay." I said.

"Lord, I pray that You would watch over us and guide us for Your plans in our life are Your decision, alone. No matter what happens please help us keep our eyes fixed on You, and be reminded that even though we will go through hard times, You will help us through and thank You for our sweet Evie, we will cherish her and delight in the fact that she is watching over us and that she is protected by You. Now forever we will say _**It is well with my soul.**_ _**Amen."**_ He wiped the tears from my eyes and looked at me. "I love you, ."

I laughed anxiously "And I you, my Sweetheart."

I knew Elizabeth would be coming over soon to pick Abby up for her party but I just didn't have it in me to wake her. She was such an angel and just then as if she were reading my mind, I heard a knock at the door .

"Perfect timing, she should be up from her nap any minute now." I whispered and stepped aside, gesturing for her to come in.

She stepped inside and I could she was delighted to see Abby . "How long has she been asleep?" she asked.

I looked at the clock, "Just about an hour, now?"

"I hope she was well behaved." she said.

"Elizabeth, she's an angel. She was absolutely perfect the whole time she was here." I assured her. "I honestly can't thank you enough for letting her stay with Lee and me. It definitely was something we needed to discuss and see how we felt. And it helps that we absolutely _adore_ her."

"That makes me so happy." she said, "I'm glad she was able to help you not only with you talking with Lee, but also with what you told me yesterday."

"She really did. I'm still upset about it, naturally. More than words can express, but she's definitely lightened my mood."

"Mama," Abby had woken up and was reaching toward Elizabeth with her little hands.

"Hello, my love." she went over and picked her up, kissing her cheek.

"She knows her mama's voice." I smiled, "You should go and get her ready, the party will be starting soon." I smiled.

"You're right," she said, "Thank you so much again, Rosemary for watching her."

"Always, Elizabeth. It's a pleasure." I smiled.

Abby shifted in her arms, leaning toward me and reached for me.

"Maybe I won't be leaving," she laughed.

She handed Abby over to me and I held her, "Yes, little darling?"

Abby gave one of her baby kisses to my cheek, "Aunty Wosie," she said with a three toothed smile.

Tears formed in my eyes as I handed Abby back to Elizabeth. "I'll see you in a little bit, baby girl." I said.

"See you later, Rosemary," she said to giving me a one armed hug and she nodded.

She and Abby left. I knew I would see Abby shortly but I already missed her.

When we arrived at the party I hugged and greeted everyone and my favorite, and the guest of honor, Abby Rose. I went to find Jack who was already talking to Lee.

"Hello, Jack!" I hugged him.

"Rosemary, I'm glad you could make it. How are you feeling?" He asked sounding concerned.

"I'm doing much better, thank you, I would like to talk to you later after the party, if I may?"

He nodded, "Yes of course. I hope everything is alright," his Mountie instinct showing, not faltering even after all that's happened to him.

"It will be soon. We could use some prayer in the meantime. We will talk after the party." I gave him a reassuring smile.

"Always, Rosemary." he smiled and Looked at Lee, "Thank you both again for watching Abby yesterday and this morning. It was a lot of help."

"It was our pleasure, Jack, really." I said beaming. "Well.. There is actually something on my mind.." I trailed off and looked nervously at my loving husband who gave me a nod of approval, placing a hand on the small of my back for support. "You remember when I was in the infirmary a few months ago?"

His face fell and became serious, "I do, yes."

"Well, I didn't exactly have influenza.." I turned away from the crowd but still facing Jack where he could see me. I could feel the tears starting to form in my eyes and Lee was now rubbing my back and listening intently.

Jack looked down and back up at me, "Elizabeth and I figured that, but we didn't want to intrude."

"Thank you," I continued, "I..umm.. Well I found out that I had been pregnant and had a miscarriage.." I said looking down at the floor in disappointment.

"Oh, Rosie… Lee," he looked between the two of us. "I'm so sorry to hear that. I can't even imagine how devastated you must feel."

"I had a really hard time and still continue to have my bad days as well. I was really depressed and that is why none of you ever saw me. Then, yesterday at the dress shop, when Elizabeth stopped by to check on me I just couldn't hold it back any longer. The depression was eating away at me. I didn't feel deserving of anything and I felt like a failure but when I saw Abby again, everything changed." I said as I wiped a tear from my eye.

"Which brings us to our next subject." Lee said. "When we were watching Abby, Rosie and I talked about it and we would really love to try again to have another child. Abby has brought us closer together and we just absolutely adore her!"

His eyes lit up, "Really? Good! That's exciting!" he smiled. "I'm glad Abby could do that for you two."

We all smiled and laughed and made our way back to where Abby was opening presents. I looked all around us at every person. _I can't help but to think about how blessed we are with all of these people here that love and care about us. Jack and Elizabeth really are the best friends we ever could've asked for. Thank you, Lord for our_ _**family.**_

A few months later, Lee and I were finishing up our dinner at Abigail's, and she approached us with two plates of our favorite dessert, chocolate cherry cake. Something was different though. It smelled absolutely repulsive and even the thought of putting it anywhere near my mouth made me nauseous. Lee looked increasingly nervous, because he noticed I had gone ghost pale. I gripped the table and I could feel myself getting sick, so I took off running outside. I could hear Lee worriedly saying, "Rosie, Sweetheart, what's wrong?"

Lee rushed to my side as a wiped my mouth and covered it, now worried about what just happened. "Honey , what's wrong?"

"I don't know. I just got so ill over the thought of the cake.. And you know how much I love cake," I pouted.

He stroked my cheek, "Rosie, you're burning up. Let's get you away from this rain, it will make you worse."

"Okay," I said half-heartedly.

Abigail was waiting for us and Lee kindly gesturing for her to take the cake back as he sat me down on the couch.

"Rosemary I brought you a cool towel for your forehead." she placed it on my head.

"Thank you," I said.

"Is there something wrong with my cake? I know you usually don't turn it down, plus it's your favorite.."

"If I knew why, Abigail, don't you think I would say something!" I snapped.

Abigail nodded and walked away looking hurt.

I started to cry and looked at Lee, "I don't know what's wrong with me," I sobbed.

"Shhh, it's okay," he soothed, "It's probably almost time for your cycle. Let's go home and go to bed. I noticed you haven't been sleeping well lately."

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

Lee thought to himself. _Maybe something IS wrong.. She never tells me I'm right._

The next morning I shot out of bed with the most gut-wrenching feeling in my stomach, _Oh no, not again I can't be getting sick._ I grabbed the bed pan and ran out of the room careful to not wake Lee. I couldn't stop vomiting, I felt so light headed. I guess my effort to not wake Lee didn't work, as he came up behind me and held my hair back with one hand and was rubbing my back with the other.

"Rosie, I think you should go see Carson today just to make sure you aren't getting a virus," he said concerned.

I finally caught my breath and looked at him with my tear-filled eyes and nodded with agreement.

Later that morning we arrived at the infirmary, Carson and Faith were finishing up their breakfast and greeted us, "Hello Mr. and ! What brings you in today?"

I looked at Lee and he nodded at me. "I haven't been sleeping well lately and I've been getting sick the past couple of days…"

Faith looked at Carson and nodded in agreement. Carson motioned Lee over to him and Faith and I went over to the triage area.

"So altogether, how long have you been feeling sick?" she asked.

"A few weeks, but it intensified last night and this morning to where I was actually vomiting and almost couldn't stop."

"Okay, I see" she scribbled in her notebook. "And when was the first day of your last cycle?"

 _My cycle… Oh goodness._ "I remembered I never had it last month and just thought I was stressed," I hesitated, "but I have been having cramping like usual and the pain is sometimes worse. I have also been light headed and having hot flashes."

"Okay Rosemary, I think I know what's going on." she smiled.

"O..okay," I said, confused about her smiling.

"Rosemary, you're not sick. You're just pregnant," she giggled.

"A..Are you sure?" I asked. I couldn't help but smile. I thought about it and remembered when we took a trip to New York last month to take our minds off of everything. And it worked _really well._

We saw "Romeo and Juliet" on Broadway and the portrayal of Juliet was so magnificent. The actress was involved I almost forgot it was a play and was hanging on her every word. Even now when I think about it I am moved to tears. _Oh how I miss the theatre! Although, If Juliet were smart enough she would not have killed herself, she should have just waited for Romeo. Don't even get me started on pitiful Romeo…_

After the play we went for a walk through Central Park and the view was so beautiful under all the stars and dim lamps. It was just the perfect evening.

Lee stopped walking when we reached the center of the Gapstow Bridge over the pond. He turned and looked at me.

"Rosemary Coulter, you are so beautiful," He said as he placed his hands on the small of my back pulling me in for a kiss. I don't know if it was the show or just being away, just the two of us, but the passion is the air was overwhelming.

I felt the heat rise to my face as our lips entwined. Lee pulled away slowly, my chin in his hands and we looked in each other's eyes, "We can keep walking or we can go back to the condo. Your call, sweetheart." he smiled. Not a grin, not an ear to ear beam, but a soft, loving smile that I fell in love with.

We practically ran, chasing each other and laughing like two school children who had a crush on one another. I knew he was a faster runner but he let me run ahead of him and when he caught up to me we were right by the front door of our condo. He wrapped his arms around my torso from behind me, moved my hair and was nipping at my neck.

I turned to face him knowing that I was blushing and said "Darling I think it's time we go to bed," I teased, winking at him before I grabbed his hand and led him inside.

"Rosemary," Faith said, "Are you okay?" she asked, placing a cool towel on my head. "You passed out for a brief moment. It's normal for your body to adjust this way to your new hormones that are going crazy because of the baby." she said reassuringly.

"Oh I'm feeling better now," I said. "Thank you so much, Faith," I said. "Oh and would you mind keeping this between us for now until I talk to Lee and The Thornton's?"

"Of course," she winked. "It will be our secret."

Lee and I were heading back home and went to get Abby. Jack had asked us to watch her while he and Elizabeth went on a special date for their two year anniversary. I felt like Lee knew more than he was telling me but I just let it go.

I laid Abby down for a nap and went upstairs to talk to Lee. I took a deep breath "Lee, Sweetheart," I said, "We need to talk about how my visit at the infirmary went."

Looking a little frightened, he spoke up "Honey what's the matter?"

"Well Faith and I talked and she told me that I will be sick for a while.."

"W...What? Why?" he said now looking confused.

"I'm pregnant, Lee." I said with tears filling my eyes.

"That's wonderful!" He said picking me up. He kissed me and then touched my stomach. He got down on his knees and looked up at me and kissed my belly. _I am the luckiest woman in the world._

About an hour later Lee and I were sitting at the table and decided to have dinner at Abigail's to celebrate and tell everyone the news, since Jack and Elizabeth would already be there. Abby started to stir from her nap so I picked her up and she hugged me "Auntie Wosie, I woove ouuu!"

I couldn't help but smile as Lee and I walked hand in hand to the cafe, giddy about this new adventure we were about to take as husband and wife. Finally becoming Mommy and Daddy.

Lee, Abby and I all walked in, hearing the last bit of Abigail's comment, "Oh, you showed her the house already?" Lee asked, "I thought you were waiting until the day of your anniversary."

"I was going to, but I couldn't wait." Jack smiled and took Elizabeth's hand across the table.

"Mama!" Abby said from my arms and reached for Elizabeth. She let go of Jack's hand and took her.

She kissed her cheek, "Hi baby,"

"What house?" Abigail asked.

"Jack had construction started on our house," Elizabeth said happily.

"On the hill?" she asked.

"Yup," Lee said smiling, "Our lumber has been perfect for the project. Ow!" he held his arm.

"Leland Coulter, you never told me that Jack decided to start building!" I scolded.

"I had everyone on a need-to-know." Jack put his hand up, "That was all me,"

Lee looked at Abigail, pointing at her, "Wait, you were talking about the house?"

Abigail shook her head, "No,"

"Then what-?" Lee furrowed his brow.

"I'm pregnant," She said, smiling from ear to ear.

I grabbed onto Lee's sleeve, "Well I guess that makes two of us!"

Everyone's attention turned to me, and even Lee's.

"Rosemary… you're?" Elizabeth asked.

"Yes, Elizabeth, I'm pregnant!" I grabbed Lee's hand. He leaned over and kissed my temple.

"Oh, Rosemary! Lee! That's wonderful! I'm so happy for you two!" she stood up and held Abby in one arm and hugged us both with the other.

Jack stood up and did the same, "Congratulations you two. Lee, we'll have double the cigars." he joked, but Elizabeth elbowed him. "What?" it's completely feasible." he laughed.

Lee chuckled "Congratulations are in order for the both of us, Jack, I do agree. Let's get the Bourbon."

I pinched his arm again, "Leland Coulter!" I scolded, scrunching up my face.

"Ow! You know? We don't need to take this abuse." Lee said.

"I agree," Jack said.

"Now, now, how about all of you sit and relax. It's been big days for all of you." Abigail said. "I'll get you anything you want. On the house."

Elizabeth went to put Abby in a high chair, "Abigail, that isn't necessary," she said.

"Please, it's a congratulations from me." She smiled. We all nodded, knowing better than to argue with Abigail of all people. "Now, what would you like,"

Elizabeth spoke up, "Anything but coffee,"

"Anything but sweets," I said at the same time. We looked at each other and laughed.

"Well, that narrows it down to a lot," Abigail said and we gave her our orders.


End file.
